Tereza Dušková

Part One – Leit’ka

Chapter One

It was a dark and cold night. Here and there a faint Spirit shimmered hesitantly on the black canvas of the sky. The surrounding forest cracked and moaned eerily. Members of the Daab tribe shuffled with unease and huddled tighter to each other. A young woman, Ar’Qa, was lying in the centre of this strange gathering, her mouth wide open in a silent scream. A drop of sweat trickled down her forehead, carrying a reflection of the single torch burning at her feet. An old woman placed her hand on Ar’Qa’s lips to catch any sound that might dare to escape. It was Umss’a, whose eyes had seen the world change. She lovingly wiped the shine off Ar’Qa’s forehead. Ar’Qa’s nostrils flared as she desperately tried to fill her lungs with air. Young Alala was kneeling at their feet, waiting expectantly. Few steps aside sat Ganuk, the Leader of this tribe, and watched everything distrustfully from underneath his thick burrowed eyebrows. Earlier on he had brought sightings of a large wolf pack, starved to desperation. The wolves could be close and their eyes were sharper than Ganuk’s in the night. His tribe had arrived to the site just after the Ala-lila and didn’t get a chance to build any shelters. It was a vulnerable time.

Ar’Qa’s heart was scared. She could feel it in her chest, dancing wildly. She couldn’t find any feeling in her arms or legs anymore; it was as if the darkness had swallowed them. Please, Spirits of this World, give my baby life. She wearily turned her head, just a little bit, to look at him. He was sitting by her side, holding her shaking hand. His beautiful eyes were filled with tears. Don’t worry my love. Everything is how it’s meant to be. He smiled at her through the pain that tore at every muscle of his face and the smile gave her the last bit of strength she needed. Her eyes widened. Umss’a gave a single firm nod to Young Alala who reached in between Ar’Qa’s trembling legs and pulled.

A fierce shriek pierced the tense air. A couple of men, standing further away on patrol, hissed disapprovingly. Young Alala quickly wrapped the baby in Barrb skin and pressed it against her chest to silence the cries.

‘The baby is bleeding,’ she whispered with terror in her voice.

‘That’s not her blood,’ replied Umss’a as she gently placed two painted stones on Ar’Qa’s closed eyelids. She looked up and started solemnly whispering the Song of the Departed Soul to accompany the poor mother on her final journey towards the Dwelling of the Spirits.

‘Ou-ala-a’e’ala anas’ fa-ra eia,

illa a’e’ala as-fuloo umba’ei ra eia.’

Young Alala looked at the fragile creature in her arms, who stopped screaming now and only sobbed silently, as if also in mourning.

‘It’s a girl,’ she whispered and handed the tiny bundle to him. He took it in his arms and moved it gently to the rhythm of Umssa’s voice, which had sung to many arrivals and many departures of the members of this tribe. He kissed the baby girl’s blood-stained head and laid her tenderly into Umss’a’s arms.

‘Un-a- gar e tu’l allar,’ the old woman threw a pinch of dust onto the baby’s face and lifted her in the air to thank the Spirits for giving her life and good health. Then she turned to Ganuk, offering him the baby in her outstretched arms. For a long, uncomfortable moment Ganuk just stared motionlessly at the sobbing bundle, chewing bitterly on a stalk of grass. Feeling many expectant eyes on himself, he jumped casually off the rock he had been squatting on and straightened himself to his full impressive height. Nobody moved as the Leader of the tribe took a few careful steps towards the baby. He cautiously avoided His eye contact. Ganuk could grab the baby by her tiny foot and throw her from the cliff if he wished to do so. After all, she wasn’t his child. As he approached the bundle tentatively, Young Alala unconsciously took a step back. Not because she was afraid of Ganuk, but because for the first time ever she saw fear in his dark, impenetrable eyes. Ganuk gnarled. He grabbed the baby and brought it closer to his face, examining it intently. The baby sneezed and snivelled unhappily. Then her tiny fingers wrapped around Ganuk’s thumb. Ganuk clenched his teeth and grunted. But when he returned the baby back to Umss’a, his eyes were changed. He nodded again and growled, ‘Un-a-gurra-al.’

Umss’a’s thin dry lips stretched into a wide smile.

‘Un-a-gurra-al,’ echoed the reply, as each member of the tribe hesitantly at first and then with increasing warmth welcomed the baby into the family. When he saw that the baby had been accepted, he covered his head and shoulders with a thick cloak, placed one last kiss on Ar’Qa’s forehead and turned to Umss’a, who was gently cradling the sobbing baby girl. He took a simple stone necklace off his chest and hung it around Umss’a’s neck. Without a word they looked at each other and understood. He turned around and walked away into the darkness of the night.

Si’a sharply opened her eyes. Her breath was heavy and her forehead damp with sweat. She placed her hand on her heart and felt its gallop under the double layer of Ulluk fur she used as a blanket. She sat up and shivered. The air was getting colder every day. She looked around herself, confused for a moment, and then allowed herself to take a deep, calming breath. She was home. Everything was in order. She yawned and stretched, feeling all the muscles of her body ache and burn. They were entitled to complain for they had spent the entire previous day running. Si’a climbed up to her feet and put on her dress. She fastened it at the front with a buckhorn buckle and threw a Sszaza fur over her shoulders. She looked around and smiled to herself. Asma and Gazz’la were still dancing in the arms of the Goddess Issraa but all the other girls were already up and about. Ever since Un-rug had reached the age of becoming the next Leader, all the girls had been competing for the position of his First Mate. They could break their backs just to fetch him some berries or wash his clothes.

Si’a stepped out of her hut. Goddess Aell’a was just about to rise from behind the Mon-ruk mountain and the air smelled like fresh forest, sweet and vivid. She tried to shake off the faint memory of a dream that had visited her in the night. Again. More of a nightmare, really. Bubbly laughter pulled her out of her thoughts as the youngest boys of the tribe ran past her, whistling and shouting.

‘Alala brought some mushrooms to Un-rug but he told her that she was too old to compete for his attention and that she should join Umss’a in picking roots instead!’ the boys roared with laughter. Si’a shushed them, poor Alala, and set off downhill towards the richer parts of the Illa’il forest at the edge of her tribe’s settlement, where all the herbs, plants and mushrooms grew.

She loved the morning music of the forest. She could hear the E’rri’g bird chirping, calling for a mate, one of the last birds to mate right towards the end of the season, when every other creature was already preparing for a long and icy sleep. She could also see the footprints of a Barrb family that had passed by in the night. She ran down a steep slope, bent underneath a couple of branches, balanced across a fallen tree trunk and jumped over a stream, letting her bare feet carry her forward, dancing between the twigs, roots and plants.

Finally, she sprinted out of the edge of the forest and into a valley, bathing in the morning mist, feeling the breeze ruffling her hair, spreading out the tall grass in front of her and catching the morning dew on her fingertips. A few more leaps and now she stopped abruptly and turned around as dazzling scarlet light painted her face. Just in time to watch the God Aell’a rise beyond the Mon-ruk mountain and spread her beautiful veil across the valley, soothing and warm. Si’a breathed in deeply, closed her eyes and allowed the light to caress her.

After a long moment of tranquillity Si’a slowly turned around and looked across the grass plane towards the Gundun mountain at the other end of the valley. How mysterious you are, mighty Gundun mountain. What life do you carry? As if in response a large flock of birds lifted off the base of the mountain and formed a spearhead shape in the sky. The mountain looked wild and free from human touch. Si’a turned back towards her territory. A wave of excited nervousness washed over her body. Today was a day she had been waiting for ever since she was a little girl. A day she had been working so hard towards. She searched the tall grass for the Quia wildflowers. They were hard to find at this time of the year.

‘Assi-a-Quia,’ she found one, plucked it gently and entwined the bright blue blossom into a strand of her hair. Soon she found another one and brought it with her back into the safe shadow of the forest. Umss’a wasn’t far away, kneeling in the fallen leaves and picking Saar’ss plants out of the ground with her bare hands. At first sight she gave the impression of a frail old woman, with thin arms, entirely covered in wrinkles, that made her skin look like a bark of a very old tree. But the mischievous shine in her eyes and the subtle, knowing smile resting on her thin lips at all times betrayed the energy and presence that still ruled her body and mind.

‘Ha-nn se ga, Umss’a,’ Si’a bent down and kissed her wrinkled cheek. She weaved the second Quia flower into Umss’a’s hair and nodded contentedly at her creation.

‘Ha-nn se ga, Si’a, come help me with these Saar’ss, they burn my hands,’ replied Umss’a as she heavily sat on a fallen tree, cushioned with moss. Her voice was deep and cracked, ringing with undertones of an ancient mystery, of a long life that had seen many wondrous things. Si’a kneeled down beside her, skilfully wrapped some freshly fallen leaves around her hands for protection and started plucking out the stinging herbs.

‘You went beyond the edge of the Illa’il forest again,’ said Umss’a, looking vacantly into the distance as if she wasn’t even talking to Si’a. But then she took the Quia flower out of her hair and looked at it with such concern, it made Si’a blush. ‘You know why we call this forest Illa’il?’ continued Umss’a patiently.

‘Because it is said to be safe and plentiful,’ replied Si’a as she had been taught. ‘But it hasn’t been plentiful for a while and whether it’s safe is also questionable.’

She couldn’t help it. She looked at Umss’a apologetically. She never liked talking back at her. Umss’a meant everything to her. The old woman shook her head but the kind smile never left her lips.

‘It is certainly not safe for you to come out of the shadows of the forest, alone.’

‘I just wanted to watch God Aell’a rise from behind the mountain. It is the most beautiful sight,’ murmured Si’a in her defence.

‘You have not seen many sights yet, Si’a. You have many more seasons to live and many more paths to take. Besides, shouldn’t you be preparing for your Rajjara Erra?’ Umss’a’s smile widened. Si’a nodded and looked away but she was too late. Nothing could escape Umss’a’s curious stare. ‘But there is a heavy weight on your heart, my kopp’a’cha. What is it?’

Si’a’s heart skipped fearfully. She herself was surprised by the uncomfortable feeling of uncertainty that suddenly overcame her. Perhaps it was the dream. The Saar’ss plants somehow got through the leaves and her hands were starting to burn. She forced herself to look at Umss’a.

‘Somehow… I have this feeling… That no matter how long I run, how much I dance or sing or sacrifice-’ Si’a hesitated and buried her eyes into the ground.

The wrinkles that created deep ridges in Umss’a’s skin seemed to fold into themselves even deeper as the old woman lowered her voice in an answer.

‘Your eyes are sharp. Your mind is bright. And your Spirit is strong. Some will never accept that. But some will follow you wherever you go. Listen to your heart and let it guide you.’ Umss’a always spoke in riddles. She stretched and her back cracked loudly. ‘And now I will go and have a warm mug of tea. And you better get ready for your ceremony or you’ll get into trouble,’ Umss’a chuckled. Si’a nodded obediently and helped her Elder to her feet. ‘Run now, my child, you have somewhere to be. Not me, I have been to too many places already.’

Si’a gave her another quick kiss on the back of her hand and disappeared between the pine trees.

Si’a spent the afternoon roaming through the woods, absent-mindedly looking for flowers and berries that she could use later to paint her body and hair. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t focus on anything in particular and her mind kept escaping back to her dreams and to Umss’a’s words. Even the last drops of excitement had now drained from her and all that was left was worry. Her heart felt heavy, as if it was tied to a stone at the bottom of a wild river, which tossed it back and forth in its currents. A thin trail of blood followed Si’a through the forest. It was her Oll’uj-ullura, a sign that she had become a woman and had the right to take part in the ceremony. She shouldn’t be alone in the forest in that state, she knew that. But she couldn’t make herself go back, not yet, just a little longer, just to steady her nerves. Her entire future depended on tonight.

A squirrel was looking for food few steps from Si’a’s feet. It was snuffling in the dry leaves for seeds and insects, unafraid. Si’a watched it for a while. The squirrel seemed light and present, without a trace of worry or doubt. I want to be like you, little soul. As if the squirrel heard her, it lifted its head, stopped mid-motion and sniffed the air. And then, like a lightning bolt, it disappeared atop a rich Somm’am tree.

‘What’s the hurry?’ laughed Si’a and followed it up with her gaze. Storm was gathering above the forest. Si’a turned to head back to the settlement when a strange feeling tickled her stomach. She paused and her eyes searched the darkening forest. Everything was still, apart from some leaves swaying in the breeze. Almost lost in the rustle of the forest came a low growly sound. In an instant Si’a bent down and grabbed a dry branch from the forest floor, exactly at the same moment that a strong grey wolf stepped out from behind of a bush. He seemed calm and confident, no surprise, as he was followed by three slightly subtler companions. Si’a was completely outnumbered.

She locked eyes with the alpha male and lifted the branch slightly. Even by her periphery vision she could see her poor choice of a weapon – the branch was so dried-up and wizen that a sneeze would break it in half. Si’a frowned and stared into the alpha’s fearless eyes as he curled up his nose and snarled. She tried to focus on slowing down her breath and not panicking, whilst her mind was reeling desperately. Do not run. She was automatically going through all the lessons she had been taught about facing a wolf pack. Do not show your fear. Easier said than done. The wolves had now surrounded her in a circle and there was at least six of them. Zarr’sk. Si’a started slowly turning around, keeping an eye on the whole pack.

Without a warning the animal closest to her charged. Si’a dropped the useless branch and instinctively punched the attacking wolf across its snout. The wolf yelped and swerved away into the forest. Si’a turned around just in time to see a female wolf jumping towards her. She managed to kick her leg up and hit the wolf’s chest mid-jump. The wolf, in her desperate effort to hold onto Si’a as she flew by, jabbed her long clutches into Si’a’s arm. The speed of the attack brought both females onto the ground few metres from each other. A throbbing pain in her arm overwhelmed Si’a and the trees swirled around her. The female wolf gnarled from pain and retreated. Si’a glanced at her arm and saw blood pouring from the claw marks. She swallowed the sick feeling that was rising up her throat, took a sharp breath and managed to scramble back to her feet. From the corner of her eye, Si’a could see another wolf launching at her and a moment later a sharp pain ripped at her calf. This wolf was smaller and lighter than the rest and so Si’a grabbed it by its fur and threw it away, together with a piece of her own leg. She looked through her blurred, teary vision at the hole that gaped at her from the place where her calf should have been, the raw crimson flesh pulsating. The alpha gnarled again and this time Si’a replied. Her mind fogged with pain, she stood up tall, opened her arms wide and released a strong, loud shriek that echoed through the forest. The alpha swung his tale and took a tiny step back.