The Darkest Gift

Fabien turned and looked at me. “No, I am not ill. It is something much worse. I hardly know how to tell you, so bizarre will you find it. I am not sure you will believe my story at all.”

“And yet you are going to tell me the truth.”

“Yes, of course, Laurent. That is why I have such misgivings. Let me say, before I begin, that from the first time I met you in the park, I have begun to feel alive again—for the first time in a long time. I have enjoyed myself in your company as I have not for many longer years than you would find possible. And then there was our first night of intimacy,” he said, almost dreamily. “I have never had those feelings with anyone else, Laurent. It was a new thing to me.” By this time, I was all tenderness to Fabien.

“To me, too,” I said. “I thought maybe I was the only man in the world to crave another man so intensely. I wondered why I was made so different from other men. Do you feel that, too? Is that what made you want to separate yourself from me?”

“No, I had another reason for fleeing. A much more serious reason.” He pulled his chair close to mine and took my hand. Once again, his was like ice. “I am not the man you think I am. I am not a man at all—that is, I am not mortal.”

I could think of no reply to this since I could make no sense of it. Not mortal? Since Adam sinned, all men have been human. Surely Fabien was not going to ask me to believe he was a demon— or an angel? If so, I would have to try hard—and probably unsuccessfully—not to laugh in his face.

I left my hand in his and stared into his blue, blue eyes, waiting for him to resume talking, to explain what could not be explained. My heart began to beat faster and faster; it felt like it would burst out of my chest. I stared at him in anticipation. He looked at me and began to explain. “Laurent, I am one of the living dead, more commonly

known as a vampire. I was made into one over a hundred years ago by someone I have grown to loathe,” he said.

“I don’t understand. Living dead? —Vampire? I have never heard that word before. What does it mean?”

“I will tell you everything, and I ask that you allow me to talk uninterrupted. “What is a vampire, you ask? A vampire is the body of a dead person that is reanimated by regular infusions of blood. A vampire is neither alive nor dead but undead. A vampire is a creature of the night who must rest by day—and is free to roam only when the sun has set because the sun will kill him. A vampire never grows old himself—so he is cursed to have to witness the deaths of all his family and friends. The only nourishment a vampire can consume is blood. He doesn’t require the foods humans eat.”

“The vampire has many supernatural abilities. He can transform himself into certain animals—bats, rats, and wolves. A vampire can see in the dark, and his senses of smell and hearing are so keen that he can detect things humans cannot. A vampire can turn into mist or fog and move much faster than any mortal eye can detect or follow. A vampire can hypnotize humans and can summon them using telepathy. A vampire can levitate and can fly through the air. If a vampire decides to move far away—he must be transported in a sealed container or box filled with the soil of his birthplace.” Fabien turned to me. “You must think vampires are quite invincible.”

I did not know what to say, so I waited for him to continue. “There are several ways that human beings can guard against vampires. Crucifixes and holy water are proper tools. A cross is usually held up towards the face of the vampire, driving it away, while holy water—if unleashed on the vampire, will burn, and disintegrate its skin. Garlic also works as a deterrent against vampires. There are many ways to destroy a vampire—as I mentioned, sunlight will.

Fire also will kill a vampire. You can behead a vampire or drive a stake through his heart.”

“As for how I became a vampire, I was bitten by one— who then forced me to drink his blood. That’s how a new vampire is made: one who is already a vampire brings a human being to the point of death by drinking all of his blood and then reanimates him by forcing him to drink the vampire’s blood. I tell you all of this because you must know the facts to make a free choice to accept my offer or to refuse it.”

“What is your offer?” I asked though I had a glimmer of a guess. “I want to make you a vampire, Laurent, so you will never die—so

that we can be together always.” Fabien paused. “I know this sounded horrible, and indeed it is horrible in many ways to be a vampire. Not for nothing does everybody fear us. But since I was made a vampire— against my will—it is the only way to be together. And I need you, Laurent; I love you as I have loved no one else. I know I am selfish, but perhaps you need me, too. Or perhaps you will pity my love for you.”

I reflected on every word he said and contemplated my life before meeting him. There hadn’t been a meaningful one; I had never met another man who longed for the physical touch of another man, even if he wasn’t indeed a man, yet a creature of the night. I felt anxious and became confused, asking myself, what kind of existence would I experience? I felt apprehensive as I remembered tasting my blood after being pricked by the thorn of the rose in the park. I thought about how this would become my nourishment, blood. A substance that would sustain my existence if I were to join Fabien and evolve as he, one of the undead.

As he gazed at me tenderly and longingly, I could not have loved him more than I did at that exact moment, I felt as if Fabien had bared

his soul to me had finally been truthful, yet his dark secret frightened and intrigued me.

I looked at him without concealing the love and compassion I felt as I stood up, reflecting deeply on his words. For a while, we said nothing to each other. There was nothing but silence between us. I walked over to the window and looked at the darkened Paris night, thinking, this is what my reality would become if I were transformed into a vampire: it would be nothing but eternal nights. Finally, I gave him my answer.

“Yes, Fabien, I am willing to become a vampire,” I said. “You’ll never know exactly how happy you have made me with

your decision. You shall come to live with me—I don’t want there to be any physical distance between us,” he said.

“Nor do I,” I replied as he came closer to me.

“Are you ready to begin your journey with me now, Laurent?” “I am ready, Fabien. Give me the gift of immortality.”

“It is a gift, but a dark one,” Fabien said. “You must be sure this is what you want.”

“I am sure, Fabien.”

His face turned from a somber expression to one of complete happiness—and then, in a moment, his eyes went from deep blue to a crimson red as he opened his mouth to reveal two abnormally large incisors as he told me to tilt my head over to one side. Then I felt excruciating pain as his incisors bit into my neck, as my blood ran down my throat. The room spun around as he sucked the life force out of me. I grew weaker and weaker. I was barely able to whisper the words, “Am I going to die?”

“Yes, Laurent, you will die a mortal death. Then you will be reborn,” he said.

With that, I lost consciousness.

I knew I had a few drops of my mortal life left when I awoke. Fabien was saying, “Now that I have drained you to the point of death, you must drink my blood. It will resurrect you to eternal life.” He bit into his wrist, and the blood trickled out. He put his bleeding wrist to my mouth. I was so weak it was difficult to open my mouth, but I managed to drink a drop or two—three— four. I felt a new power enter me, a new strength, but along with this power came convulsions—I screamed in pain, but I heard Fabien say, “Fear not, Laurent—you are being reborn!”

The convulsions stopped, my eyes closed, and I saw nothing but blackness. Then suddenly, a sea of scarlet red washed over my brain, and I began to gasp for air as if I were drowning.

“Breath,” Fabien said.

One large gasp for air was enough.

When I opened my eyes again, my eyesight had a clarity that it had never had before. I gazed at Fabien’s face, able to make out every pore in his skin—even down to the intricate detail of his hair follicles, as he knelt over me softly, cradling and stroking my head with his strong hands. Fabien helped me stand as if I were a small child about to take its first steps. At first, I felt like a newborn, a bit unsteady but I quickly regained my strength and walked over to the window and opened it.

The coolness of the night no longer chilled me. Fabien walked over to where I was standing and tenderly put his hand on my shoulder in an unspoken way of displaying his love for me. The crystal clarity of my vision was profound. My hearing was significantly enhanced as well: I was witness to sounds I had never heard before, creatures stirring in the nearby park, leaves that rustled up against one another.

I looked down at my hands, which were now as bloodless as Fabien’s. I walked to the mirror on the wall and saw that I cast no

reflection. The mirror was as empty as if no one at all were standing in front of it.

Then an overwhelming hunger made me double over in pain. It felt as if it would tear me in half; I felt as if I hadn’t eaten in a lifetime—there was an overwhelming thirst, as well.

“My God! What is this hunger?” I yelled at Fabien. “It is the vampire’s lust for blood,” he said calmly.

“Well, then, feed me! You made me into a vampire—so feed me!” “Yes, I shall, but you must first listen to what I have to say. I have

one rule, which for me justifies our very existence. Some human beings prey on others, who rape, pillage, and murder— it is those criminals, and only those, whom I feed on: the criminals’ human society fears—and do not search for once they go missing. If there is such a thing as evil, surely it is those who prey on innocent, law-abiding, and unsuspecting citizens. I have chosen these evil humans to be my lifeline, and now they will be your lifeline as well. We will kill no others. Are we in agreement, Laurent?” he asked.

“Yes! Yes! Please, for the love of God, feed me! I cannot take this torture!”

Fabien opened the window. “Remember, I told you that vampires can fly. That is what we are going to do now. Observe.” He climbed onto the windowsill and glided down to the darkened sidewalk. He motioned me to follow. I hesitated.

“Laurent come to me!” he called.

I jumped off the window sill and was airborne, thinking to myself, My God! I’m flying! I felt a slight tickle of excitement in my stomach all the while laughing in amazement and disbelief as I landed next to where Fabien was standing.

We decided to take a stroll in the park. Under the trees, there was total darkness—but now that I was a vampire, I could see all there

was to see, trees and shrubs along with various creatures, such as birds, nesting in their branches in the dark. Walking in the park was something I had always wanted to do with Fabien, but I had never imagined that it would be at night. I thought briefly about never again being able to feel the warmth of the sun. I had taken it for granted, but now sunlight was something that would kill me.

“How was your first experience flying?” “It was beyond my wildest imagination!” I said excitedly. “Good, and about your hunger; has it subsided a little, Laurent?” Fabien asked, sounding concerned.

“Yes, a bit for the moment,” I replied.

“We shall find someone deserving of death soon. Paris has many criminals roaming the streets at night” he said, reassuring me.

“Fabien, there is one thing you mentioned just before you turned me. I would like you to explain,” I said.

He gave me a curious look and said, “Oh, what is that?”

“You mentioned earlier that there is another vampire loose in the world—in fact, the one who turned you over one hundred years ago,” I said, but his attention had been caught elsewhere.

“Listen!” he said. “I heard a scream nearby.”

“Let us investigate,” Fabien said, as a glimmer of excitement appeared in his eyes.

We ran faster than any mortals could have done, and we arrived at the scene of a crime. A man wielding a sword was threatening another man. When he saw us, the victim screamed, “Help me!”

The would-be assailant raised his sword and said, “There is nothing these two can do to help you—tonight, you’re going to die, so prepare yourself! Once I finish with you, it shall be their turn!”

“Wrong, it is you who will die tonight!” Fabien cried, his eyes glowing red.

“Run! Save yourself now while you still can!” I said to the victim. The assailant was distracted by Fabien’s threat, and his victim

ran away into the night. Fabien grabbed him by the neck, lifted him in the air, and proceeded to choke him as he struggled against Fabien’s vise-like grip; despite that, the man was still alive.

“Laurent, here is your nourishment,” Fabien triumphantly proclaimed.

Instantly, we began to tear at the murderer’s body, Fabien at his throat, and I at his wrist.

Conflicting thoughts flooded my mind. On the one hand, Fabien had taken a life, and that was a sin, then again—this was not a life worth preserving. The assailant had attempted to murder someone. We had saved the life of a man who would otherwise have been his victim. If we were to limit ourselves to feeding on criminals, then we would be helping to rid society of them—and that was all to the good.

Fabien dropped the body to the ground and retrieved a handkerchief from his waistcoat to wipe his mouth. He handed it to me so I could do the same.

“Quickly, we must dispose of the body,” Fabien said as we picked up the corpse and started digging with our hands until we had dug a hole deep enough to bury the body. If this man had a history of criminal activity, the authorities would undoubtedly search for a while and then give up and label it as an unsolved mysterious disappearance.

Once the hole was dug, we carried the body over to it and placed it in the freshly unearthed dirt. We covered it within seconds using vampire speed and strength. As soon as we covered the plot with soil, we wiped the dirt from our hands with Fabien’s handkerchief.

“Shall we return to your apartments, Laurent?” Fabien asked.

The color was coming back into his face. I looked down at my hands and saw that the color was coming back into them, too. It was because of the blood we had drunk.

We returned to my apartments, entering by the same window we had left through only a short time ago.

“How was your first experience as a vampire, Laurent?” Fabien asked with genuine concern.

“All I was thinking about was feeding myself,” I confessed. “This is my new reality—I accept it.”

Fabien nodded and said, “I struggled with my first experience as well. Stefan forced me to kill anyone and everyone in our sight, even families with little children.” He turned away from me as if in shame.

After a moment, as if he needed some time to compose himself, he turned around to face me and said, “Now allow me to tell you about another vampire I know. He is the only other to my knowledge; however, there may be others—such as the vampire that made Stefan. It was Stefan who made me a vampire. He, too, was my lover—to my everlasting regret.” I intently listened as he told me how Fabien and Stefan had met at a café, the Alexandre, which is why Fabien preferred meeting at the Procope, careful to avoid the other café altogether for fear of the two of us running into Stefan.

Fabien shared with me that he felt he was tricked into becoming a vampire without his consent, that he had met Stefan and was drawn to him by how handsome he was, with his wit and charm, which soon turned to unending cruelty. They had attended cultural events together and finally became physically intimate. As I heard, I became enraged with jealousy, making me hate this creature even more. Fabien described how Stefan delighted in torturing Fabien, primarily through wild and endless killing sprees. Of the many attacks—Fabien explained there were two that stood out in his mind, which brought him to tears.

The first was the killing of Fabien’s trusted servant Jacque, forced to witness Stefan brutally and savagely kill him, and there was nothing Fabien could do to stop him. He paused for a bit before continuing to share the other killing, which had so upset him. An attack on an entire family, including the family’s coachman and small children—of hearing the parent’s cries for mercy to spare the children, and finally, the children who discovered that monsters genuinely exist, which lead to their deaths. Fabien had reduced himself to performing horrific acts under Stefan’s command, deciding never to do this to anyone else. When he found his soul mate—Fabien intended to give that man a free choice whether to become a vampire or remain mortal. And he had seen me and given me the option.

Upon hearing this, my love for Fabien grew; I couldn’t contain my sadness upon hearing what torture Fabien had endured at the hands of Stefan, as blood tears ran from my eyes as I reached out to wipe the ones running down Fabien’s cheeks as well. Once I had finished wiping away Fabien’s and my blood tears, I thought a change of scenery was in order. I had recalled how fond Fabien was of frequenting the café. I suggested we take a stroll over to the Procope to lose our thoughts of Stefan in a game or two of chess once we composed ourselves,

As he smiled at me and said, “What a wonderful suggestion, yes—let’s stop all of this talk about Stefan. Instead, let’s enjoy the solace of our café and each other’s company.”

I could tell Fabien had become emotionally drained in describing their tortured history together to me.

I walked over to the window, hearing thunder as I gazed out into the blackened night as lightning lit up the sky, looking out, thinking I