Imagine if the song Jolene described a secret obsession between the singer and the subject. A wife and husband both enraptured by the same woman, their separate curiosities leading to breaking and entering, they find themselves in Jolene’s house. They are in the same space, but worlds apart.
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An enjoyable diverse…
An enjoyable diverse interpretation of one of my favourite songs. Needs some slight amendments but nothing drastic. Am interested to see where this story is going to go. One could forecast the ending; yet... it may be that the author will leave us guessing and finish on a twist?
Great Emotional depth
This piece is really strong. Full of emotional depth. Setting off questions in my head about how it will go. All the miss-reading of eachother. All the assumptions. How communication would solve everything, and sensing that is the least likely outcome... I fear these two will not end well.
This story has so much…
This story has so much potential, and your writing is compelling. That said, I find myself wondering if there's enough material to sustain an entire novel. Since we only get a little of the woman's first-person POV, I can't say for sure, but I feel like her voice may be too similar to the man's. I'd definitely have kept reading, though!