If Versus When

Genre
Award Category
Rayless Brown needs a dream come true to turn his 'if' into a 'when', however in Nocturne dreams can turn into nightmares and fight back

Prologue

Rayce Brown sped through a series of caves and caverns that seemed to be cut in half by a barrier that couldn’t be seen, touched, heard, or smelled. In fact, the only reason he knew there even was a barrier was because he couldn’t figure out how to get to the other side. The three Indian guides he had hired to accompany him on his expedition didn’t seem to be aware of it at all which was beginning to make Rayce question his sanity, but his map reassured him. The map that he had suffered and strived for years to obtain. After acquiring it, more years of trouble and toil went in to following the map and he was finally at the spot marked by the X. But here was this barrier that no one else could see. Rayce was deathly afraid the X was going to be on the other side of the barrier and all he’d been through would be for nothing. For you see, Rayce Brown was a dashing, daring treasure hunter extraordinaire. And the thing he liked to collect best was books. Not just any books, but books that were rare, antique or could change your life when you read them. And the book Rayce was about to be standing in front of was rumored to make dreams come true.

On the other side of the barrier that may or may not be, was Coal, a chimera, and his friends. They were doing what they had been doing for days and days and what they would be doing for days and to come. They were mining dust, dark and light, which would be minted for their pay. In their free time, chimeras would step into the thoughts of the person they were attached to and blow dust on their sleeping brains and attempt to influence their person to achieve their dream. Or avoid their nightmare. Or maybe keep their person from doing anything useful at all.

Coal happened to be Rayce’s chimera. He had influenced Rayce with dust filled dreams to travel the world collecting treasures. He had enjoyed watching Rayce’s adventures by observing them through his dreams. So much so, that he dared dream he’d find a treasure too. And the two were about to be in the same place at the same time. An alignment of stars, comets, planets, and moons that had never before occurred.

As Rayce stood where the X on the map should be, it didn’t make much sense. It didn’t look like a place where one would keep a book. It was easy to look around and see there was nothing but cave wall. No place for any treasure, least of all a book. While his hired guides took the opportunity to rest and drink from their canteens, Rayce reviewed his notes and map to see where he went wrong. He hadn’t. He was where he ought to be. He was standing on his dream come true and it wasn’t there. He looked at the map again and thought he heard a slight tapping sound. He glanced at his guides who had obviously heard nothing. In his frustration, he banged his fist on the cave wall and to his surprise, his fist broke through. After brushing away some dirty gravel, he saw the edge of a large book. Oh, how his heart leapt!

With the help of his guides, he carefully removed the book from the wall. His eyes shining, he ran his hands along the cover. It was entitled “Sommnier”. He tipped it on its edge to open and read. It’s pages tornadoed endlessly. A journal with countless entries made by countless writers. He began to read. Before he was able to finish the first entry, his eyes crossed involuntarily. By the time he was able to uncross them, the words no longer made sense. They swam on the page and were no longer readable, try as he might. It took all he had not to howl in frustration.

On the other side of the wall, his chimera, Coal, just had the huge diamond he mined taken away from him by his overseers. Coal’s need to howl was equally as strong.

Rayce adventured no more after returning from the cave with the book in tow. He settled down with a wife and annually brought the book out to try and read it. When he couldn’t, he would lock himself in his room and drink excessively. It would take a day or two for him to return to normal. His wife, and later his son Raymond learned to keep away on those days. Rayce had some renewed hope that his son would carry on his adventures when he noticed Raymond’s love of books. It died however when Raymond opened a bookstore and did nothing more than sell and read the books within. It sparked one last time when his grandson was born but when he looked at the boys unfocused eyes that needed glassed almost immediately it died it’s final death. He thought the boy was named well. For while Rayce had raced all around the world, his grandson Rayless was certainly ‘less’ than he hoped. He passed away before he was proven right.

CHAPTER 1 Meet Rayless Brown

She was not his dream girl. If he slept a million nights, he would never dream up a girl like her. Rayless Brown always thought the girl he fell for would be blonde and blue eyed like himself, but she had dark eyes that made you think of mysterious, deep tunnels that would lead you into trouble if you went through them. He thought his dream girl would be quiet and full of bookish insights, also like himself. Instead, she was brash, bright, and had probably never gotten to the words ‘the end’ of any book.

He had seen her for the first time a few years ago when she arrived at the coffee shop next to his bookstore. He watched her and her friends buy a coffee and sit down at the outdoor dining area in front of the shop. Before he could stop himself, he had walked out of his store to order a latte and get a closer look. He realized he didn’t have the guts to talk to her and that he had left his shop unattended at the same moment and rushed back into his store. That afternoon he put a ‘help wanted’ sign on the shop door. The next morning, he hired a new high school graduate that he didn’t really need to be in the store, just in case she showed up for coffee again.

She did come again. Almost every day. He watched for her arrival and either stared at her out of the plate glass window of his bookstore or occasionally he would go over and buy a coffee. She was rarely alone, an ever-changing group of friends floating in and out. He always hurried back, too shy to speak to her.

The day he finally got up the nerve to greet her, he walked up behind her and overheard her telling her friend d’jour about what her dream guy would be like. Tall, dark, handsome, and heroic. Nothing Rayless would ever be. He decided then and there the kindest, most respectful thing he could do for her would be to leave her alone. You would think he would stop dreaming of her after but no, he couldn’t get her out of his head.

It made no sense to him that he couldn’t let it go. He never saw her reading and she never ever even looked at the displays in his bookstore window. How could he even think about someone who couldn’t be bothered to read? And now? Even he didn’t read nearly as much as he did before she showed up. He thought about her all the time and they had never shared a word.

She was beautiful, but so were a lot of women. He could see dreaming about how beautiful she was if given enough nights. After all, regardless of how pretty, it was just a face. You know, two eyes, a nose and a mouth and given enough nights he possibly could have dreamt her beautiful face.

But never, never, in a million nights would he have put that freckle on the top left corner of her lip. He would have died before he would consider marring such perfection with something as out of place as a freckle, but there it was, and he couldn’t get it out of his mind. He thought about that freckle all the time. No, she wasn’t the girl of his dreams, but she haunted them anyway. She didn’t see him, didn’t even know his name. But you couldn’t hold it against her. No one else did either.

They didn't see him because of his glasses. They were large, thick ugly glasses that kept anyone from actually seeing his eyes, which was a shame because his eyes were really quite lovely and as mysterious as hers. His eyes were the only lovely thing about him, and they were hidden by those glasses. He wasn't even sure what he looked like without them because he couldn't see himself clearly in the mirror when they were not on his face. The first thing he did each morning before getting out of bed was put on the glasses that were a hated weight, which he carried around the entire day. They kept him from being a hero like the ones he used to always read about. None of the heroes in any of his books wore glasses. He used to love books and admired the heroes in them but now they set on his shelves and seemed to mock him. Because a hero would fall in love with the right girl and be able to win her affection. And a hero wouldn’t wear ugly glasses unless they were a disguise.

Chapter 2

He grabbed those glasses out of sheer habit last night when an unfamiliar noise awakened him from a dream about her. He looked around the darkened room trying to locate the source of the raspy creak that shouldn’t have been. He saw the vague wispy outline of a black, murky figure. Becoming more alert by each tick of the clock next to his bed, he snapped on the lamp on his nightstand. With the speed of the light that suddenly flooded the room, the unknown figure retreated to a darkened corner. He studied it, trying to find something to help him give it a name, but nothing came to him. He took off the glasses, so it would go away. He rubbed his eyes and returned the glasses to his face, expecting whatever it was to be gone now that he felt fully awake. It was still there. Still trying to find something to give him a clue to what he was dealing with, he noticed it was holding a book. Finally, they had something in common. Books. Books, he knew.

Unable to come up with anything better to do or say, he asked “What are you reading?” It turned and looked at him. Rayless assumed that because it fled into the corner that whoever he was dealing with was cowardly and not a threat.

He was wrong.

This thing slowly moving toward him did not appear safe at all. There was no fear and a sense of menace in his approach and a lethal looking sword across its chest. It sat the book in front of him on the bed. “You can see me. Can you hear me as well?” it asked. A nod was all Rayless could manage. His eyes flitted around the room searching for something to verify that he was dreaming; the only explanation he could muster for what was happening. He found nothing to help.

“Interesting. I wonder why that would be.” It spoke with an edgy voice that was so smoky Rayless had to strain to make out the words.

Still looking for anything to help him understand why this thing was in his room in the middle of the night, Rayless saw the book in front of him and recognized it as one from his library. “What are you doing with my father’s book?”

“I’m trying to read it, but the words float around the pages and make no sense to me. You say it is your father’s book?” it asked.

Rayless’s heart was beating so fast it was becoming distracting. “Yes, most of the books in my private library are books my grandfather brought home from his travels. This was packed away. Why did you get it?”

“Because I need it.”

“Well, it’s mine! Who are you?” Rayless really needed something other than ‘it’ to work with.

“Could your father read it?”

“I don’t know! I assume so. I can’t imagine why he couldn’t. I never knew him to not be able to read something. What do you mean the words float around the page? Can’t you read?” Rayless picked up the book and sounded out the title for the ‘it’. “Look.” He said dragging his finger under the letters as he sounded it out. “Sommnier.”

“The words stay still for you?” It was beginning to smell smoky as it moved closer.

“You must tell me who you are before I give you any more reading lessons.” Rayless pushed the book away stubbornly.

“I am the Rancor Archon.” It said. “The High Archon over Nocturne”

“That means nothing to me.” Rayless answered. “That doesn’t help.”

“Archons are rulers in the land of Nocturne. We call ourselves chimeras and we are able to connect with people’s minds and influence their dreams, both daydreams and nightmares. It would probably be more helpful for you to think of me as the reigning king of nightmares. I have ruled for years, but I am beginning to lose my ability to rule well.” It pushed the book back towards Rayless. “And in order to govern my kingdom I need to know what’s in this book.”

Rayless needed a beat to take all this in. In an effort to appear calmer than he was and to buy the minute he needed, Rayless picked up the book and began to thumb through the pages, which tornadoed endlessly. Rayless couldn’t see any way all the pages could fit inside the book he was holding. The ‘Archon’ immediately tensed and Rayless thought he would demand it back, but he made no move toward the book. He did, however, Rayless noted uncomfortably, rest his hand on the sword. Rayless examined the book more closely, starting on the first page. The words did seem to wiggle and wave almost as if trying to escape the page. The more he stared at them, the straighter they seemed to become, like wandering soldiers that finally halted in formation. There was no title page, no index, nothing to help him navigate the book. It was pages and pages of a journal that appeared to be kept by an endless number of writers. He returned to page one and began to read, his interest peaked. “The legal tender and currency of Nocturne will be as follows: Dark dust will be compressed into ‘Grits’ and ‘Cinders’. One Cinder will be equivalent in value to ten Grits. To redeem the dark dust, one blow on coin will be exchanged for twenty minutes of negative, dark emotion to enable bearer to facilitate nightmare. Light dust will be compressed into ‘Flurries’ and ‘Flakes.’ One Flurrie will be equivalent in value to ten Flakes. To redeem light dust, one blow will be exchanged for one hour of positive, light emotion to enable bearer to facilitate daydream.” Rayless looked up at the Archon who was now excitedly pacing the room. “Why do you get an hour with the light dust and only twenty minutes with the dark dust?” The Archon distractedly picked up and put back down items as he considered the page Rayless had just read and answered. “It is easy to give people daydreams. Nobody fights them and it requires very little energy to give someone a daydream. But nightmares, nobody wants them. It requires a great deal of effort to make someone accept a nightmare. It costs a lot more.”

“Is that what you do?” Rayless wanted to know. “Give people nightmares? Why would you do that? If it costs so much and, as you say, nobody wants them, then just stop! Seems easy enough.”

“Nightmares are necessary! If there were no nightmares, no one would accomplish anything. They would just sit around and daydream all day. We are chimeras and we provide incentive to people’s dreams. Daydreams are like the carrot you hold in front of the donkey to get him to move. You just need one to tempt him to come to you and he enjoys it and loves you for it. A carrot though, is not enough. You also need a stick behind him to move him as well. And though it might take many hits, and he won’t enjoy it or love you for it, it is just as necessary. That is the purpose of nightmares. We are just as important as daydreams because we can use fear and discomfort to motivate people to accomplish their dreams. No one wants us to make them uneasy, but we are even more effective than a pleasant daydream to get people to accomplish their goals.” The Archon finished his defense and turned to Rayless. “Due to the higher need for the dark dust we use to motivate you, it is running out more quickly than the light dust. This is causing both a shortage and an imbalance in Nocturne’s economy. As High Archon, it is my responsibility to address this issue. I also seem to be the only one aware of the seriousness of this threat to our world. The book you’re holding is a dream journal and has been written in by every chimera there ever was and somewhere in its pages may tell me how I can find more dark dust before our supply is gone.”

“And YOU can’t read it.” Rayless kicked out his feet and leaned leisurely against the headboard with his hands crossed behind his neck. “Seems to me like you need to hire yourself a translator and it appears that I am the only one qualified for the job. How many Flurries do you suppose I should charge?” Rayless was only half joking.

“Flurries would be useless to you. They only work for chimeras. Here, see for yourself.” The Archon held out a bright, glowing disk. It filled Rayless with an intense desire to touch it and he immediately reached. He didn’t think he could take his eyes off it if he wanted. It was warm and tingled slightly in his palm. “Blow.” instructed the Archon. Rayless looked at him, confused. “Blow!” he repeated. “Like it just told you in the book. Blow on it.”

Rayless held it in front of his mouth and gave it a long blow. “Nothing happened!”

“Exactly!” answered the Archon. “You are not a Chimera.” He removed the disk from Rayless’s hand, rather forcibly as Rayless did not want to give it up just yet. He held it in front of Rayless and gave a blow. Along with its charred breath, Rayless received a face full of rainbow glittery dust.

And he was with her.

They were laughing on a beach, holding hands, and chasing waves and seagulls…and with a snap of the Archon’s fingers he was back sitting in his bed without her. He noticed the disk was slightly smaller as the Archon put it away. “I would like to see the dark dust.” Rayless asked, intrigued. “You don’t need to blow it on me. I will take your word that it would make me feel as ugly as the other was sweet.” The Archon pulled out another disk, just as full of sparkle, but dark and black. Rayless had to force himself to take this one, it came with a repulsion as strong as the desire for the light one. It was cold to the point of being painful and he returned it quickly and without being asked.

Rayless did not wish to let such an opportunity escape and wracked his brain for something for which he could barter. “Can you make dreams come true?” He asked with sudden inspiration. That would be a wonderful trade!

“That’s what chimeras live for, to help the person they are attached to achieve their dream come true. Most chimeras have unexciting lives and the best way for them to be remembered is by influencing their persons dreams which is the one thing that will ensure a chimera going down in history. Since we don’t read and write like you do, its our best shot for living on after ourselves. A chimera’s job is to help you make your dream come true, but we can’t actually do it for you. We can only influence you while you sleep and hope you act on our suggestions when you are awake. You haven’t been acting on your chimeras influence, so far. Dreams coming true are really very rare. It doesn’t happen often. I could provide you with some excellent nightmares, as many as you need to move you to act and make your dream happen, but most people do not wish to sign up for this. And as I have already stated, our reserve is running low.” Rayless remembered the dread associated with just touching the dark dust and shuddered. No, the Archon was right. Even for her, he didn’t think he could bring himself to sign up for nightmares. Still, he remembered the beach, the sea breeze on his face, and the thrill of her hand in his…..

“What is her dream? The girl I was walking on the beach with?” he asked, hit with another inspiration.

“I do not know. But as High Archon I am able to learn this.”

“When you do, you let me know.” smiled Rayless. “And then perhaps I will read another page for you.” Both the light and the Archon disappeared and Rayless rolled over and immediately fell into an exhausted sleep. Some of the would have been even without the dust.