Chapter 1
Thursday, June 6, 2002
Though the sun was high in the sky, it wasn’t strong enough yet to burn off the damp morning chill. The mug of hot coffee Jeff Hensen was cradling didn’t help. He set it down on the round cast-iron table and nudged the zipper of his windbreaker closer to his chin. No wonder the waiter had given him a strange look when he’d asked to be seated outside. Maybe it hadn’t been the best idea, but he was anxious to watch the citizenry of his new hometown stroll the sidewalks by this quaint corner café. As it happened, the sidewalks were a restrained bustle. Even the cars on the narrow streets seemed in no hurry to get where they were going.
Yep. I could definitely do this. Living in San Luis Obispo was worth a try. It wasn’t his first choice, but at least it was a long way from Racine. The corners of his mouth curled a bit as he considered that—at least for now—he had nowhere else to go. If I have to be stuck somewhere, I could do a lot worse than here. He inched his chair farther around the table to catch the late morning sun. From his changed vantage point, he could see more of the downtown, including the dome of the cathedral. It looked…respectable. It wasn’t ostentatious or even impressive, but it suited the sturdy Spanish style of the building and gave it a certain gravitas.
I could have said Mass there. But no, that ship had sailed. Too much drama.
Seeing the cathedral made him think of the San Luis Obispo boys from back at his stint at the seminary in Rome. He’d tried to keep his curiosity about his ex-flame Paul and his partner Jared in check…really, he had. Yet, he knew he’d run into them. As the attorney for the diocese, his Uncle Roger would have plenty of dealings with them—or at least with Paul, who was now Bishop Mickleson’s secretary. Being this close to those guys was the one thing that had given him second thoughts when his uncle offered him this summer internship. Still, working for the diocese with his uncle would at least keep him close to the Church. He glanced around nervously. Jeff half expected to see Paul saunter by, and he dreaded it. But honestly, wasn’t that the real reason he was sitting out there on the cold patio? Odd creatures we are, dreading what we hope for.
His coffee was getting cold. He turned his attention back to the interior of the restaurant. Almost on cue, the waiter passed by the glass door carrying the ubiquitous coffee carafe. He tossed Jeff a look that said, Don’t think I’m coming out there in the cold just to give you a refill, but he must have thought better of it because he pushed the door open.
“Can I warm that up for you?”
Jeff figured he might as well make the trip outside worth the fellow’s while, so while the waiter refilled his mug, he ordered a ham sandwich and fries. It wasn’t quite noon yet, but close enough for an early lunch. The waiter would appreciate his running the tab up a little.
Making a buck. He felt good about how things were turning out for him. He’d barely known his Uncle Roger before deciding to go to law school. There was a lot about family life in Racine that he hadn’t been privy to. Jeff had been a toddler when Roger had left for California. Maybe his father had had some part in that. He’d made no secret of his disdain for Roger. Even the mention of his name would set Dad off on a tear. That reaction, more than anything else, had tipped Jeff off that his uncle was probably gay. Now here he was, sharing a condo with this guy who was still mostly a stranger. Yet, it felt right.
The waiter popped out the door, laid his lunch on the table, and disappeared back inside before Jeff had a chance to say thanks. He picked up the sandwich gingerly—they certainly didn’t skimp on the portions—and took a healthy bite. He was hungrier than he’d thought.
Funny how things had worked out. Naturally, he’d turned to Uncle Roger when he decided to leave the seminary. After all, Roger was a successful attorney. Jeff hadn’t seriously considered becoming one when he was growing up, but over time, the prospect of following in his uncle’s footsteps had gained a certain allure. It was intriguing, at least.—and it would certainly pay the bills.
“They make great sandwiches, don’t they?”
The voice behind him, so close to his ear, startled him. He spun around in his chair, surprised to find himself nose-to-nose with Father Paul Fortis.
“Oh, my God!” was all he could croak out. He swallowed quickly, fearing he’d choke on the clump of sandwich he’d just bitten off.
Paul leaned over the wrought iron fence that separated the patio from passers-by. He had changed little since their seminary days, though he’d lost some of his belly fat. In that way—and maybe only in that way—Jared had been good for him. His receding hair showed a tad more gray at the temples, but his broad smile was still the same.
“May I join you?” There was an unmistakable twinkle in his clear blue eyes.
“Of course.” Jeff fumbled around, rearranging the chairs and moving his plates to make room, while Paul disappeared around the corner. Jeff’s insides were in a knot. It was the encounter he’d been anticipating, but now that it was happening, he was conflicted. He hadn’t counted on the emotions that seeing Paul again would arouse in him. Stay calm. He was determined not to put Paul in the awkward position of dealing with his muddled feelings. It would ruin any chance they’d have of maintaining a working relationship. He took several deep breaths and a big mouthful of coffee as he waited for Paul’s return.
The glass door swung open, and Paul stepped onto the patio grinning broadly. He spread his arms wide and said, “C’mere, you.”
Jeff nearly knocked over his chair trying to stand up. Even though his cheeks reddened, he gave Paul what he hoped was a warm welcoming smile as he stepped into his embrace. Paul kissed him on the cheek, but his Roman collar’s stiffness against Jeff’s jaw kept him anchored in reality. He gave Paul a couple of friendly pats on the back, and they released each other.
“It’s so good to see you.” Paul was still grinning, but with a noticeable flush on his cheeks.
“How did you recognize me?”
Paul rolled his eyes and laughed. “I’d know that crazy mop of hair anywhere. Besides, Roger told me you’d arrived. I wasn’t exactly looking for you—I thought you’d still be settling in—but I’m not surprised to see you here. It’s my favorite lunch hangout, and you’ve always had good taste.”
Jeff motioned to the empty chair, but Paul was already pulling it out to seat himself.
“So, you’re here for the summer?”
“Right.” Jeff scooched a couple of inches closer to Paul. “I’ll be working with Uncle Roger till school in the fall.” His curiosity got the better of him. “He told you I was coming?”
Paul grinned. “Warned me is more like it, about how sexy his nephew was—as if I didn’t already know. But I didn’t let on.”
Obviously, his uncle wasn’t just a casual acquaintance. “You see Uncle Roger a lot? I knew he did some work for the diocese but…”
“I see him all the time.”
“So, you work at the chancery?” As if he didn’t know.
“Dude.” Paul laughed. “I’m the bishop’s secretary. Can you imagine?”
“Very grand,” Jeff said.
Paul shook his head. “Not really. I do his calendar, drive him around, and run his errands. I’m not much more than a glorified chauffeur.”
The waiter emerged from the café, landing a glass of water in front of Paul. “Can I get you something else to drink? Hot coffee, maybe?” He gave Jeff a telling glance.
Maybe Paul didn’t want to be sitting out there in the chill air. “Would you rather sit inside?” Jeff asked.
Ignoring the impatient waiter, Paul said, “Not at all. I like it out here. It’s more…private.” He gave Jeff a wink and turned back to the waiter. “Coffee’d be great—black.” He waved at Jeff’s sandwich and fries. “I’ll have the same.”
The waiter scribbled something on his pad and hurried back inside.
Paul sipped from his water glass. “So, you’ll be working with Roger this summer?”
“More like working for him. He hired me on as his paralegal to see if I’ll like the work.”
Paul raised his eyebrows. “A paralegal? But you haven’t started law school yet. Roger said you’d been accepted to UCLA Law last year. What happened?”
“Things got fucked up.”
“What? Your acceptance?”
“No. That was a done deal before I left Rome. It was the finances.”
“I can imagine. It’s expensive. You know, Jared and I would be happy to help you out. He’s got more money than God.”
At the mention of Jared’s name, Jeff flinched but kept his composure. “Uh…thanks, but it wasn’t that.” He sighed. “It was my mother. She had one thing to take care of—to get her tax returns to the financial aid office—but she’s totally useless. Turns out she hasn’t filed her taxes since the divorce, and that was five years ago. I had to straighten out all that crap for her and at my own expense.” He clenched his teeth at the thought of the extra year he’d had to spend in Racine.
“She didn’t know how to handle her finances after your father left?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know, and I don’t care. I’m done with her.” He took a vengeful bite of his sandwich, then realized he should have waited until Paul had been served. Luckily, the waiter arrived with Paul’s sandwich and a mug of coffee, then turned on his heel and left them.
“So, is everything settled now?” Paul lifted his sandwich off the plate.
“Yup. The financing went through, and I start law school in the fall. I’m looking forward to it. My life’s been too chaotic for too long.” As soon as Jeff realized what he’d said, he looked away from Paul and pretended to catch sight of something interesting on the street.
They ate in silence for a couple of minutes.
“You’ll have to come by the apartment,” Paul said. “Jared would love to see you.”
Well, that wasn’t true. And…how about those two priests sharing an apartment? That was just too convenient. “How is Jared?”
Paul’s expression turned serious. “He’s having a tough time. He’s been assigned to a tiny parish in a Podunk town called Tres Robles, and his pastor’s a real asshole. He doesn’t like Jared, and the feeling is mutual.” He gave Jeff a wry smile. “Jared calls it Our Lady of Perpetual Hell.”
So, the trust fund kid is struggling. “Then what’s with the apartment? Did he rent himself a getaway in the big city?” He was letting his rancor get the best of him.
“It was the bishop’s idea. He suspects something’s not quite right with that parish, so he sent Jared to scope it out. The apartment is really for me, but he knew Jared would have a rough time and he knows how close we are. He figured we could help each other out.”
“Right.” Jeff wondered if the bishop knew how close the two of them actually were, and if maybe he was playing the don’t ask, don’t tell game. That’s exactly the game Jeff hadn’t been prepared to play. The prospect had soured him on the whole idea of priesthood. “So, Jared lives in San Luis in the apartment with you?”
Paul swallowed the last chunk of the sandwich and started on the fries. He shook his head. “He’s only here on some of his days off—whenever he can get away. Did you know he’s a pilot? He rents a plane whenever he wants to fly down here.”
Not surprised. He’s a spoiled brat. He drained his mug of coffee to keep from saying something he might regret.
“Where are you staying?” Paul asked.
“In Uncle Roger’s guestroom. It’s okay, I guess. It’s good that I’m staying with someone I like—and we’re both gay, so that helps. But he’s my mother’s older brother, after all. I’ll have to behave myself. Kinda puts a damper on my first summer of freedom.”
Paul held a French fry halfway to his lips. “Would you consider bunking with us? I’m sure the bishop wouldn’t mind. Jared’s only there a couple of nights a month…and we share the master bedroom.”
I’m sure you do.
“The second bedroom is officially Jared’s room, but nobody ever uses it. It could be yours. How about it? It’d be fun.”
Jeff used to find Paul’s naivete charming, but this? Maybe things weren’t as rosy between him and Jared as he’d let on. Why else would he invite an old classmate into their love nest?
“Sorry, Paul. I appreciate the offer, but I can’t afford it. I have to save everything I make for school expenses. The scholarship only goes so far.” He felt a certain smugness at having the courage to deflect a most interesting prospect.
Paul dismissed his argument with a wave of his hand. “The diocese pays the rent. Even though he's hardly ever there, Jared takes care of the grocery expenses. He calls it his contribution to our life together—such as it is. I’m sure you’re giving your uncle something for staying with him, aren’t you? It might be cheaper for you to live with us.”
Twist my arm! “What if Jared doesn’t go for the idea?” And he won’t.
Paul’s smile broadened and the twinkle returned to his eyes. “I know my way around that boy. He’d love having you bunk with us.”
There are none so blind… Yet even though Paul was clueless, the prospect tickled Jeff to no end. So, why not? It would give him the freedom he craved, and it wouldn’t be boring. Besides, in the worst-case scenario, he could always go back to Uncle Roger’s. He smiled nervously. “I guess I’ll have to talk to my uncle.”
“Don’t worry about him. He’ll be happy to be rid of you.” He jotted down the address on a paper napkin and handed it to Jeff. “Come by first thing tomorrow, and I’ll show you your new digs. That’ll give you time to clear things with Roger. Jared flies in later this afternoon. I’ll give him a heads-up.”
As Paul paid the bill, Jeff had a chance to look him over. What had so captivated him two summers ago? Was it just the excitement of first love? It didn’t matter anymore. Jeff rose and slipped the address into his jacket pocket. “I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into,” he said as they parted.
At least I won’t be bored. Whatever ulterior motives Paul might have didn’t interest him, and neither did whatever drama his presence might bring up in Jared. At least for now, they’d be just roommates. He had better things to focus on. He’d need to learn the ropes at Uncle Roger’s law practice, maybe get some exposure to California law, and acquaint himself with Roger’s major clients, the bishop and the Church in San Luis Obispo. And, just maybe, he could meet a hot young local guy who’d like nothing better than spending quality time with a handsome, intelligent, clean-cut law student from Racine. I can’t wait.
