The Hidden

By Freya Jensen-Brandt on Sat, 12/07/2025 - 07:43
Screenplay Type
Book Adaptation Needed
Genre
Fantasy
Logline or Premise
“Hunted by an otherworldly horse-like monster, a young girl must discover her purpose to stop it before more lives are lost, leading her on a harrowing journey to unravel long-buried secrets in this unique tale inspired by Nordic folklore.”
Submission Upload
1062927.pdf

Comments

Stewart Carry Thu, 31/07/2025 - 12:45

There's plenty going on in this excerpt to make a great script but I have a few questions: why does she have to work as a housemaid during the summer and if the family are in debt, how can they afford a maid and maintain an expensive vehicle like Range Rover? Perhaps there's a very plausible explanation but it would need to be made clearer in the set-up. I also think the reference to the Hidden comes in a bit too soon (make it a surprise that we can experience with her!) and somehow conflicts with other potential sources of fear like the creepy father etc.

Freya Jensen-Brandt Tue, 26/08/2025 - 22:50

Thank you, Stewart, for your comment, it is much appreciated.

There indeed is a plausible explanation which is unveiled in the manuscript. I thought I'd mention that she is not a maid, and they do not pay to have her, in fact, it is the opposite. They get paid to have a farm hand, much like people get paid to foster children. I hope this helps! Thank you again for your suggestions!